22 Jun Baby Loss Poetry
Empty, numb, with a distraught mind,
feeling like a piece of me has died inside.
That gaping hole longing to be a mum,
forever grieving Brandon, my first son.
Whose life was cut short far too soon,
now united with the angels, shining from the
It’s been two months, yet I’m fighting to move
tears, shattered dreams; I can’t believe he’s
Looking back at me in the mirror is a shadow
pained from the abortion and miscarriage,
valleys away from good health.
From the outside I look fine,
it’s easy to fool everyone else with a brave
But on the inside I’m suffocating in a torturous
Hoping to escape and be set free,
From the pits of depression drowning me.
Prams, pushchairs, giggling babies haunt me
whenever I go out.
Rage and jealousy possess my body – why is
it easy for others and not for us?
All I want and care about is starting our own
Yet our desire to become parents is still only a
Yet we must carry on
Emerging from the depths of grief.
Bereaved, pained with loss, all we could do was weep.
Saying goodbye to our rainbow baby Brandon
at fifteen weeks, feeling completely empty.
As the most precious gift of being parents
was cruelly cut short.
Nobody wants to see a coffin engraved with
their baby’s name placed before them.
The funeral and scattering his ashes made us
feel so numb.
Yet we must carry on.
A box full of memories and reminders Brandon
will always be in our hearts.
This has been our darkest journey, but now is
just the start.
Six weeks after the abortion and we were
Unfortunately, it was not meant to be – a
miscarriage, for goodness sake.
Now to take a break, look after ourselves;
family planning can take a back seat…
Fingers crossed for a health pregnancy when
the time is right, so that Ruby or Leo can be
welcomed into the world and make our family
The last scan
Drifting out of hospital we feel so numb.
Today should have been a joyous occasion,
sharing the good news with family and friends.
Instead, water engulfs our eyes, pained by the
harsh surprise of the scan.
Waving at us on the screen, your tiny body
danced around, like mummy grooving to one
of her dance workouts.
The grooving was short lived – being told you
were surrounded by too much fluid and high
Swept into the unknown, with more scans and
tests needed to decide your fate.
It’s only been 15 weeks, but we’ve grown so
attached to you.
Whatever happens on Thursday our little
rainbow baby, you need to remember that
mummy and daddy will always love you to the
There are many organisations that offer support to anyone affected by pregnancy and baby loss.
TFMR Mamas is a community-led support network of parents who have lost their baby following TFMR (Termination for Medical Reasons).