Baby Loss Poetry

22 Jun Baby Loss Poetry

Broken

Empty, numb, with a distraught mind,

feeling like a piece of me has died inside.

That gaping hole longing to be a mum,

forever grieving Brandon, my first son.

Whose life was cut short far too soon,

now united with the angels, shining from the

moon.

 

It’s been two months, yet I’m fighting to move

on,

tears, shattered dreams; I can’t believe he’s

gone.

Looking back at me in the mirror is a shadow

of myself,

pained from the abortion and miscarriage,

valleys away from good health.

 

From the outside I look fine,

it’s easy to fool everyone else with a brave

face.

But on the inside I’m suffocating in a torturous

dark place.

Hoping to escape and be set free,

From the pits of depression drowning me.

 

Prams, pushchairs, giggling babies haunt me

whenever I go out.

Rage and jealousy possess my body – why is

it easy for others and not for us?

All I want and care about is starting our own

little team.

Yet our desire to become parents is still only a

dream…

 

 

Yet we must carry on

Emerging from the depths of grief.

Bereaved, pained with loss, all we could do was weep.

 

Saying goodbye to our rainbow baby Brandon

at fifteen weeks, feeling completely empty.

As the most precious gift of being parents

was cruelly cut short.

 

Nobody wants to see a coffin engraved with

their baby’s name placed before them.

The funeral and scattering his ashes made us

feel so numb.

 

Yet we must carry on.

 

A box full of memories and reminders Brandon

will always be in our hearts.

This has been our darkest journey, but now is

just the start.

 

Six weeks after the abortion and we were

expecting again.

Unfortunately, it was not meant to be – a

miscarriage, for goodness sake.

 

Now to take a break, look after ourselves;

family planning can take a back seat…

 

Fingers crossed for a health pregnancy when

the time is right, so that Ruby or Leo can be

welcomed into the world and make our family

complete.

 

 

The last scan

Drifting out of hospital we feel so numb.

Today should have been a joyous occasion,

sharing the good news with family and friends.

 

Instead, water engulfs our eyes, pained by the

harsh surprise of the scan.

Waving at us on the screen, your tiny body

danced around, like mummy grooving to one

of her dance workouts.

The grooving was short lived – being told you

were surrounded by too much fluid and high

risk.

 

Swept into the unknown, with more scans and

tests needed to decide your fate.

It’s only been 15 weeks, but we’ve grown so

attached to you.

 

Whatever happens on Thursday our little

rainbow baby, you need to remember that

mummy and daddy will always love you to the

moon.

 

 

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There are many organisations that offer support to anyone affected by pregnancy and baby loss.

TFMR Mamas is a community-led support network of parents who have lost their baby following TFMR (Termination for Medical Reasons).

The Miscarriage Association is here to provide support and information to anyone affected by miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy or molar pregnancy. Get support: miscarriageassociation.org.uk/how-we-help