Gerri’s story

Gerri’s story

The television was loud and the children were laughing; I was surrounded by activity but I felt I was all alone.

Suddenly my heart sank and I knew instinctively something was wrong. My heart started pounding, the palms of my hands were clammy and I could barely breath as I edged nearer the pram. Perhaps I was wrong and was fearful for nothing?

In a moment someone would pinch me, and I would feel silly about my gloomy thoughts. But no-one was there to break the reality. I looked down and she was still, no movement, no smile and no cry for her milk. I was stunned, yet I was moving, hundreds of thoughts filling my head. No sense, no reason, this was not happening.

I was a robot going through the motions, crying inside “please don’t let this happen, don’t let it be true.” I was told I did everything and it wasn’t my fault, but I didn’t believe them. It was my responsibility to make things right, to protect, to kiss & make it better. Failure was all that remained it was true she was gone.

Lauren Claire Findell

– Gerri Moore, Lauren’s mum

There are many organisations that offer support to anyone affected by pregnancy and baby loss.

The Lullaby Trust offer support for bereaved families who have lost a child through SIDS.

Bereavement Support: 0808 802 6868

Information Line: 0808 802 6869

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